Wednesday, February 1

EMERGENCY - PLEASE HELP: Loopholes to "Free to Marry" letter (crosspost from Catholic Convert boards)

Ok, here's the down and dirty: There's a diocese-wide Convalidation ceremony on Sunday. My husband and I want to get convalidated. We've got almost all the paperwork except one thing - our Free to Marry letters.

Now, his is not a problem to get. His grandmother's tickled pink about my interest in the Catholic church and is very active in her parish, so her signing the form and getting it back in 2-3 days is not a problem.

My Free to Marry form is quite a different issue. The bottom line is that I want this conversion to be between me and God before I get baptized, and then after I get baptized I was going to tell my family. I need to not be unduly influenced. I was planning on easing them into the whole thing. (If any of you have Mormon relatives,you will understand my apprehension in telling my Mormon mother). So to get this letter, I have to tell at least one person in my family I'm becoming Catholic.

I have a very small immediate family, only my older brother and mother are still around. Due to bad childhood experiences, my brother and I are not close and I would not trust him to pick me up a gallon of milk. My extended family is also very small. My father's side of the family is all Mormon. I'm not close to any of my extended family at all - I only see them at funerals and weddings. None of them live anywhere near Dallas. The closest relatives I have are 5 hours away. I seriously doubt any of them would be willing to find a Catholic church, talk to a minister they don't know, and sign a form so that I can join a religion they feel is not the "right" one.

So, in a nutshell, I have no family I trust to get this taken care for me before my baptism in April, let alone in 3 days.

I have known my best friend Michael since college, since I was 21. I'm sure he'd do it. (I don't know if the Catholic church would approve of it much since he's a gay Mormon, but he's all I've got right now).

Please, any help at all, any advice would be greatly appreciated. Does anyone know of any loopholes, any affidavits I can sign that can take car of this without getting my family involved? If I can't get this letter, I can't get convalidated and I can't be Catholic.

St. Jude, please use your wondeful influence again to help me accomplish yet another impossible task in this conversion process of mine. Thank you.


At 1:18 AM, Blogger Brad Haas said...

I don't know anything at all about it. You might e-mail Jimmy Akin, though. He could answer you in his sleep. I don't know how quickly he gets to emails nowadays, but it's worth a shot...

At 5:14 AM, Blogger monogodo said...

Actually, we went to the Cathedral tonight for the rehearsal, and spoke with the coordinator and explained the situation. She said that it's not a problem at all having Michael sign the form (we left out the Gay Mormon part, but I don't see an issue with that). Now the only issue is logistical. Cynthia needs to coordinate with Michael and have him meet her to take care of it. She called and left a message with him last night, and is awaiting a response.

And yes, my grandmother is extremely pleased with the situation, and is more than happy to help out. I'm not sure she fully understands that it's Cynthia who is converting, and that I'm not proceeding any further, just enough to support Cynthia. But that's ok.



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